


Enough

by ace-helen (minnabird)



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: AU, Angst, F/M, First Time, Grief/Mourning, Platonic Sex, Post-Canon, it's a mishmash of platonic and quasiromantic love and sadness, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-02
Updated: 2015-12-02
Packaged: 2018-05-04 13:15:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5335436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minnabird/pseuds/ace-helen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Years on, Blue and Ronan hold the last remnants of the love the five of them shared. Broken and cast adrift, they stick together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Enough

Blue had never thought that it would be Ronan, of all her boys.

She could see a curl of his tattoo, just at the side of his neck as he bent to kiss her bare brown shoulder. Sharp, it was, no sharper than his collarbones, it turned out. Her fingers felt the truth of it, skimming across the ridge of bone. His hands were surprisingly soft for all their hugeness, molded warm against her ribs.

A gasp escaped her as his lips found the slope of her breast, feathering over her skin. His mouth closed around her nipple, shockingly hot and wet. She clutched at him, her hands rasping against the stubbled back of his head.

Later, hand wrapped around him, still adjusting to the probe of someone else’s fingers inside her, she whispered, “Why are we doing this?”

His hand stilled, and his head fell against her shoulder with a defeated _thunk_. “Do you want me to stop?” he said, teeth clenched. She rubbed her fingers along his jaw, trying to smooth away the tension there, and he raised stormy eyes to hers. She knew why. She knew for the same reason she knew Ronan the way she did these days.

Because they were the only ones left.

Because Gansey was dead, and Noah had disappeared, and Adam had taken Glendower’s favor and built on it with his bitterness. They lived together here in this steel city (Henrietta lost to them, the Barns too much a dream), and managed not to tear each other apart, and fell together until there was nothing left but this.

Ronan wasn’t attracted to Blue, but his fingers, infinitely gentle, spoke the same care he’d lavished on Adam’s hands, the one day, that final day, he’d been allowed to do so. They had never kissed, Adam and he. How strange, then, that he and Blue had kissed in their tiny kitchen tonight as if kissing came easy to them.

Blue had kissed her true love, and he had died. She had kissed him because he was going to die, and it was her last chance. Now, kissing Ronan again, she knew he wasn’t her true love. She’d felt it, with Gansey. But they carried the last remnants of that strange, encompassing love the five of them had shared and somehow, she thought this kind of love was enough. Enough for now, when it was foolish to wish for something more.

As they moved together, some time later, the sheets cocooning them, it was Ronan’s name Blue gasped, and Ronan wondered at the music in it. His mind cradled that word, her voice, as he would cradle any other small delicate thing.

Blue, curled against the heat of Ronan’s body after, wondered if at last he might sleep easy. Tears burned at the back of her throat, and she threw her arm over Ronan’s chest, pulling herself closer, hair scrunched between them. This wasn’t what they’d wanted, she thought. But it was what they had. It was _all_ they had. Perhaps, in time, it would be enough.


End file.
